grief

THE UNSEEN HARD DAYS...

I recently sent a DM to an IG friend and shared about the unseen hard days. As a parent of a child with a chronic illness there is much in our day where IG stories can not fully capture the struggles we face on the daily. When I’m asked how Dakota is doing, I often don’t know how to answer that question. How do I provide enough context while protecting my daughter’s right to privacy? How do I convey the real challenges she faces, where one can fully grasp that this is a forever thing, that one day could be good, and then the next day can be rough as heck? How transparent do I get, while protecting myself as I walk through a perpetual cycle of grief, and give myself permission to say, “I don’t want to talk about this today.”? How do I have faith in the midst of the continual unknowns?

Friends, all I can say is this is HARD. It’s COMPLEX, it’s NUANCED, and it sucks. But if you are like me, a parent, caregiver, family member to someone with chronic illness or a disability, I want to say I understand those unseen hard days. You my friend aren’t alone. There are so many of us walking through these moments, while not the same, we stand in solidarity together as we advocate for our loved ones. And with open arms, we welcome those who will cross over onto this side of being new diagnosed and when the overwhelm consume you, we will be here.

In the midst of those hard unseen days, may we acknowledge our grief, our new normal, and may we embrace what we can not change. But in it, beauty, fullness and purpose can be experienced and lived. Hope and joy can exude us as we navigate through the day to day.

So friend, when the next unseen hard day comes…. may we breathe, may we acknowledge, and may we feel all that we need to feel.

Until next time,

Jasmine

MUSIC VIDEO | GREAT ARE YOU LORD

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Friends, I'm excited to share this new cover with you guys! It's a very special song to me. Why?!?

It was a song we sang together during our worship nights with Melissa.....if you don't know who she is, you can read about her here.

Jeremy and I met up with her and the family a few different nights for worship, where we would just sing God's promises together, and pray. This song became our mantra, our declaration, that it's His breath in us, and while we didn't know what the outcome would be, we together with our eyes closed, and our arms lifted high sang.....

"It's your breath, in our lungs, Great are you Lord...."

It's now been 4 months since Melissa passed away, and there's moments where it feels so surreal. Moments where all I want to do is go for coffee dates or tacos, with her. To share our dreams with each other. She had a lot of them by the way. She had this quiet bold determination of accomplishing those things that she set her mind too, and it was so inspiring!!!

She would also name these fears that I didn't understand...her worries about it coming back. About wanting to become a mom, but her body still being out of whack. We'd pray together!!! For anxiety to be replaced with peace.

But I sit in the reality that we can't do that together anymore. I sit in the reality where I see her family oh so broken. I sit in the reality that my friends are grieving, and I don't know what else to do but be. To be with them, to text them, to say, "Hey, I'm thinking of you."

So in the midst of loss and grief, I hold tight onto:

"You restore every heart that is broken, GREAT ARE YOU LORD."